I am bipolar and just got out of a relationship. Now I am back talking to my ex husband, who I dearly love. Mom has been helping me b/c I have been afraid of being alone and was in the mental hospital for some time. She wants me to get back on track because I can barely function. She helps me with paying bills on time and around the house even. I feel so worthless. Now my ex came to visit me tonight and she says she is going to put me out of her life again…because he smokes pot a little and did some other things she did not like. I don’t know what to do. I need my mother so much………it is not fair. I want the man I love back in my life again.

Short version of a long story >>> Two friends were sleeping together, she got pregnant, she wanted an abortion then changed her mind and now they’re having a baby and trying to make their relationship work.

But they’re clashing over religious beliefs… he’s a Christian and regretting sex outside marriage, whereas she’s very sexually open and thinks it’s fine. He’s resentful that she nearly aborted his baby, she accepts that it would’ve been the wrong choice but is still pro-choice. She being practical and getting on with things whilst he’s worrying about sinning against God… he also keeps hinting about marriage but she doesn’t want to get married.

Please no "just split up" answers… we really want to make it work. I know it sounds like i’ve told you all the bad things but we also really love each other and he’s a great and very responsible person.

Does anyone have any advice on making this work? thanks so much. xxx
I’m just not a marriage person, I think it’s unneccesary and outdated. i want to see if it’ll work out before i make that committment. He’s not pressuring me into marriage, it’s just something i know he’d like.
Friendly: they’ve been friends for a few years, met at school.
correction *we’ve
Failure by design: LOL!
I should probably add that he isn’t a fundie christian… he’s an open minded and easy going guy. i think he’s just confused.
caligirl: but all that’s in the past. i know we’ve done things we’re not proud of. wouldn’t god want us to work things out now for the sake of our child?

I met my husband almost a year ago. It was love at first sight. We got married 6 months later. This is both, our second marriage. During the course of our relationship, we promised each other to be open and truthful from the beginning which has been until I learned of other things. I knew about his previous relationships and I told him I had no problem with his female friends, ex-’s or whatever just as long he tells me about them. Even if he committed adultery on me, I want to know about it. I would rather him tell me about it and we talk than to find out other ways (I could only hope he does the right thing) . I knew about his ex girlfriend (who was still married but separated with 2 young sons. Their father was not there so He took on the role as father figure) A couple of weeks into our relationship, I started getting txt messages and calls from his ex. (We lived over 300 miles apart and saw each other when we could, yet talk multiple times throughout the day, that lasted about 10 months until he finally moved in with me). His ex would tell me things to the effect that I should leave her man alone, she was pregnant, he’s been sleeping with her etc. She would also leave comments on his MySpace account sexually suggesting sending him something to hold him over till he comes back to her…..things of that nature. Being the person that I am, I had never been in conflict with other women or anything like this, so I took it as a joke and I played with it. This went on for several months. After a while, I would tell him about it and he would tell them that we were married and for them to leave his wife alone. (we didn’t married until a few months later) This kept going on until she called me to say she had his cell phones and that if I called him again she would call the police on me. That was the last draw. I said my piece and I had my number change because I felt this was getting out of hand and going over board. Somehow, she still got my number.

When my husband finally came home to live with me, I started to notice little things. My husband drinks and I noticed everything he goes back to his old town where his ex lives, he tends to drink more that usual. Just recently about 3 months ago, he had to go back for whatever reason and knowing she was there my suspicion started to get the best of me. I trusted him to the fullest then I started to have doubts. I called him many times and of those times he would click on his cell phone like he was sending me to voice message but instead pick up and I overheard his conversation with others as well with her. Telling his friends he was down there with his woman and telling her that he would sex her up and stuff. These conversations lasted 20 to 45 mins before the ph hung up. Needless to say, I was hurt because he told me many times he didn’t want to have anything to do with her and I believed him. He told me he wanted to be with me. I said okay.

a few weeks later, he happen to leave his yahoo up and me being nosy, I looked and I saw emails between him and her to include pictures of the both of them together dating back when we started dating including pictures he sent me he sent to her. I again confronted him this time he pleaded he did not ever want to lose me. Again fine. Somehow, I got information. Things seem to be getting better between us but my instincts were nagging at me until I got a hold of some emails dating current from the last conversation we had up to present. The emails contained sexually explicit pics of him to her and visa versa, statements how they miss each other and cant wait to be together again, making plans for her to move into the town we both live in now etc. I was so heartbroken I couldn’t stop crying. He lied to me yet again. I confronted him again this time with copies of the email and again he pleaded he wanted to be with me. This time wrote an email to his ex in front of me letting her know that I know about the emails and their plans to get back together. She doesn’t respect me at all. In one of the emails she sent him, she was telling him not to be sending emails to her that he sends to that "Thing he calls a wife."
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I keep asking him if he was still in love with her and he keeps avoiding the question. He can talk about his other relationship but when her name comes up, it’s a touchy subject. I keep telling him this is going to continue to be an issue until we can resolve this. He keeps throwing it back in my face saying that I have someone on the side and stuff. I don’t have nor do I desire to be with anyone else. If that were the case, I wouldn’t have married him. A lot of times I think she be throwing her sons in his face because she knows he loves those boys and treats them as they were his.

I am feeling now that his ex is finally trying to move on with her life but yet my husband is all up in her business trying to find out who she is dating and stuff. He would tell me that
He would tell me that he has this gut feeling about something that I’m not telling him. I would tell him, he needs to check his other girlfriends because it’s not from me.

I love and I’m in love my husband with all that I am and he is everything I ever prayed for. I promised myself completely to him and ONLY him. I could go out there and met other men, but two wrongs don’t make a right. I’m still in love with someone else prior to my husband, but, due to circumstances that relationship could never be. But I moved on from that. My husband tells me that he loves me and don’t ever want to lose me. We promised from the beginning that there will be no divorce. It’s now getting to the point that I’m crying about it, his ex and the things I recently learned, I’m not as open with him like I use to. He doesn’t talk to me like he use to. I would have things on my mind and he would notice and ask me what is wrong. I do tell him and all he could tell me is stop thinking about it.
I’m currently seeking individual counseling because this is taking a toll on me. We talked about even seeing a marriage counselor. When I see him sleeping in the bed, I see her. When I kiss him or try to make love to him, I’m wondering if he’s thinking about her. A lot of times things would happen and I would see. If he was thinking about me, he would say so. My mind is going crazy. I try so hard not to think about it when I’m with him. Right now all I can do is HOLD on and Hug him tight letting him know I appreciate and love him dearly.

Now, if my husband says I’m the best thing that ever happened to him and he’s in love with me why is he still chasing after his ex? I know he’s a selfish man wanting his cake and eat it to, but he can’t have it both ways. I can’t help but to feel that I lost a portion of my husband’s heart and love and he’s just saying things to make me feel good. I’m sure he really do love me like he says.
Am I doing something wrong? I can’t get his ex out of my mind because this issue is not resolved and I’m seeking counseling. Is there something I can do to help him get his mind off of her and help him move past this?

cnn youtube democratic debate question 8. Do you support gay marriage?

I’m a young christian and need some advice
My boyfriend of 9 months and i just broke up. His parents just got divorced and its been really hard on him. He feels he cant be in a relationship at the minute. We both love each other and he told me he still has feelings for me so this is even harder as we cant be together. I am upset but im also worried about him, he says he’s trying to hold himself together and be close to God but is struggling. I really want to support and be there for him but obviously he doesnt want to see me right now because he’s upset about us breaking up. He also told me that we should break up because he cant have me waiting on him because he knows its hurting me. It’s all very confusing and i dont know what God has planned for the future. I need help to get through this

My husband got caught by me in a 1.5 year long affair last year. But he kept going back to her after this. 3 times EVEN DESPITE getting threatened by people on her side – the man took HUGE huge risks to see her again.

If he promised to stay away and KEPT his promise the first time after I caught him – OK – but what made him go back for a year after he got caught by me? And now they are finally staying apart, is this good or bad?

I caught him in early 2009, cheating with her, it’d gone on for 1.5 years. After this, these 2 then went back and forth for months before he cut her off last summer, and dedicated himself to me.

There is an injunction on him, put in place by her, civilly not criminally, I might add – meaning he was never found "guilty" in criminal courts and I think she set him up.

At new year 2010, he met her to tell her he does not hate her BUT that she’s wrecked any chance that they "might have ended up together" or even to be friends. I know she was devastated. They never spoke again.

In Feb 2010 he started joining all her Facebook groups, I am guessing so he had a way to see her profile seeing as she would not accept him as a friend – then he deleted them all because she told him "I know you’re watching me".

Now it’s been 7 months since they had contact and he does seem different in the sense that he’s finally got over her but the next set of problems is that there is a definite change in him. He seems moody and depressed and angry a lot. Why the reason for this change? Is he perhaps depressed that the woman he said "is the only woman who understand me" (ie her) is now gone from his life, albeit at HIS request? (he told her he was not going to see her again or ANY woman again, as it was me he needed to make it up to, desperately).

The trouble is, what’s the point of him giving her up if he’s not happy with me? I will NEVER leave him, and NEVER let her have him but how can I make him happy to be with me again? I believe we were happy before she came along but now she’s gone, he’s realised what a big world is out there, and that he can be happy without me, although he will never leave, and did not leave me for her even when she made it really enticing (she has a flat in a great area, is in good shape, has a great job and no "nagging" family as he says mine are).

Is it out of sight out of mind or absence makes the heart grow fonder? Please assume he’s never cheated again and had never cheated before this. Would she stay on his mind or has he forgotten?

A long distance relationship that I had ended, he was not a guy with a good character and values. This guy never officially ended it with me, he just stopped contacting me. I tried to contact him but he avoids me, I wanted closure. Do you think it is a good idea to send him a letter expressing everything i want to say. Please advise. Thanks

Here’s a little info about us. We dated all through high school and he was my "first" love. He joined the Marine Corps and I moved out to him to eventually get married. Things were wonderful, he had a tendency to drink (A LOT), but I always found a reason to give an excuse for it.
We had 2 kids together, who are now 3 and 2. When my youngest was just born we seperated due to the drinking. I didn’t want that around them, nor was is a very safe environment. Sober my husband was an amazing man…but not drunk.

We have now been divorced for almost a year. I have sole custody and have moved to another state. He has cleaned his act up and doesn’t drink anymore. I am still very much in love with him and he still makes the effort to be a great dad regardless of the distance. He and I recently started talking about dating again but I couldn’t imagine having my heart broken (again).He is willing to get a job and start a life closer to the kids and I. Any suggestions on how to do this?

Ok so here is the story….my (ex)boyfriend and i had been dating for 2 1/2 years. (BTW we are 18&17) We were both really stong Christian’s when we meet but, we let Satan drive our actions and we soon became engulfed with sin. This past weekend we did something that completely ruined our relationship…we lost it to each other. Afterwards we had alot of problems…so we decided to break things off. Two days later he does it again…but with another girl. He told me the next day about everything after he realized what he had done. I am completely done with him and decide that I need to get back with Jesus. So that night he calls and is just seeking God in everything. (which has not been him for a long time) and we are both seeking God’s will for our lifes.

The question is…if you or someone you know has been through a situation similar to mine…please let me know what they did and if they are truly happy!! Thanks in advance and may God bless you in all that you do.
We are already back on the road to God….which means we have turned everything over to him….there will be no more sex or anything that would be a disappointment to him.

BTW…SEX before MARRIAGE is AGAINST the Bible…Maybe you should read it cover to cover!!

My ex husband and I got divorced on October 1st after 5 months of pure hell on my side. He is the one who left me and it broke my heart completely to make matters worse he kept making me think there was hope when there really wasn’t. I tried everything to fix our marriage before it was too late I suggested counseling even but he wanted nothing to do with it. I have NEVER really gotten a straight forward answer as to why he left me. It always changes or he gets mad that I asked and won’t answer saying he already has. His answers ranged from we fought too much and he couldn’t get over it to I am too much drama to he doesn’t love me anymore. Anyways about a week and a half ago he came to me and said that he was sorry for things he did wrong in the marriage and that he missed me. I confessed to him the same and apologized as well. We had a little talk and decided we would start completely over as boyfriend and girlfriend cuz he said he wants to try and is really trying and that he loves me. So for the past week and a half we have just been laying low no one really knows we are trying on his side cuz he says no one would care anyways he doesn’t talk about stuff like that. Part of me feels like maybe he just doesn’t wanna say anything tell he sees if we are gonna work for a while but part of me thinks maybe he really just doesn’t want anyone to know which makes me sad. He said he wouldn’t deny it if someone asked but he is not telling anyone. So he has been staying at my house for the last week and a half and is currently getting ready to move at the moment we live right across from each other. He got up this morning to leave to go get ready for work but unlike the last few weeks he took everything with him his pillow his phone charger etc. and didn’t say a word. So I said I take it your not staying here tonight in a nice voice and he said no he was staying at his place so I asked am I gonna at least see you later and he said I am sure we will talk all day even though we never talk all day we both work so I am kinda confused. Nothing happened to make him run off. I just don’t know maybe this is normal and I am just confused because I am so used to us being together as husband and wife not as boyfriend and girlfriend. What do you guys think? Any suggestions on what I should do? On how to make this easier for me? I love him with all of my heart and was thrilled that we were getting another chance but I didn’t realize how weird it was gonna be going from wife to girlfriend. I want this to work is there really any hope?